Shoutbox Shenanigans - A Distasteful Bones Parody - T rating..by Kasper

Kasper

Posted 09/12/2007 09:30:12 PM

Okay, so this started with me Kasper playing with the shoutbox located at the bottom of the screen. Eventually it morphed into a whole story, well more like a parody of Bones featuring the wisdom of phoebsfan, kiki, and of course cupcake. There are some perverted parts and some adults themes, but all in all it is hysterical. So please, sit back, relax and let us know what you think. And please, send all complaints regarding drinked covered electronic equipment to grandma, who you should also thank for the wonderful and alliterative title. Stay tuned for further installments!

SHOUTBOX SHENANIGANS - 9 December 2007

Grissom, Entomologist *chirp chirp* Sure is quiet 'round these parts. Sure could use some good bug specimens.

Jack Hodgins, King of the Lab Excuse me, but this lab ain't big enough for the both of us.

Gil Grissom, King of Entomolgy We should see about that Hodgins *hand runs along holster holding gun that magically appears even though Gil doesn't carry a gun*

Jack Hodgins, Reigning King of the Lab *Reaches for bottles of ammonia, bleach, and Spam* We shall see, Gil. *death glare will those sweet blue eyes*

Gil Grissom, King of Evidence Go lead soft point copper jacket bullet! *fires gun in an ash from pokemon throwing a pokeball manner*

Zach Addy, The King's Lackey Squints stay together, just like covalent bonding! *Zach dives down, taking the bullet for Hodgins*

Jack Hodgins, King of Chemicals Chlorine, REACT! *mixes bleach and ammonia and almost immediately a yellow-green cloud is emitted and puts on a gas mask and gets Zach out*

The Lab *WEE OH WEE OH WEE OH WEE OH, and other lound annoying sirens* Chemical contamination in Entomology Department, Chlorine contamination in Entomology

Random Unimportant Squint Oh No!.... *coughs* Save me!... *collapses*

Camille Saroyan Damn it guys, what the hell kind of experiment did you do now? *in a kyle from south park voice* OMG you killed Grissom! You *******s!

Special Agent Seeley Booth Excuse me I have a date with Bones...Bones' friend from college... yeah. Why the hell can't I get out? And when did you and Gil go out?

Dr. Goodman Hi. What is everyone doing? Why did that random and unimportant squint just collapse?

Dr. Goodman AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

Doctor Temperance Brennan Okay people, I have been trying to write the last hundred pages of my third book in two months that has nothing to do with you guys so can shut up.

Doctor Temperance Brennan Or at least act like yourselves so I know what I have to copy. Dr. Goodman, fancy seeing you after that large sabbatical if ya know what I mean...

Zach Addy, Protector of the King OMG Doctor Brennan and Doctor Goodman, together? *Jerry Springer audience type gasp*

Angela Montenegro You know about Dr. Goodman

Angela Montenegro I thought I was the only one who knew about his large sabbatical

Jack Hodgins, King of the Lab Forevermore Ange, baby, did ou see me win? Wanna go make out in the specimen closet?

Zach Addy, King of the Nerds Doesn't anyone want to know why I am not dead, or in fact thank me for saving the king's life?

The Lab and the Squints NO!

Angela Montenegro of course. It's so hot when you prove your masulinity by outwitting everyone else. Smart is sexy.

Jack Hodgins, King of the Lab Forevermore Oh baby I love it when you talk about me *leads Angela to the closet*

Special Agent Seeley Booth, Sexy Personified So um Bones, when does your friend get here?

Dr. Temperance Brennan I've been meaning to talk to you about that...

Doctor Temperance Brennan, Alter Ego, Captain Oblivious Friend, what friend, I thought we were going out together?

Seeley Booth, Alter Ego, General Sex-Me-Up Whoa, what the hell is going on here?


Dr. Sweets I knew there was tongue!! Your Jedi mind tricks don't work on me.

Gordon, Gordon Wyatt Your young age cannot outwit me. I challenge you to a duel!

Dr. Sweets my young age and naive nature will make you rue the day you ever thought to challenge me.

Gordon, Gordon Wyatt *takes out glove and smack Sweet across the cheek*

Dr. Sweets plus, the ladies love me.

Dr. Sweets cries. I'm telling my mommy.

Gordon, Gordon Wyatt Oh please, I got women. Chicks dig accents, there's a Facebook group about it you know...

Gordon, Gordon Wyatt You would, pansy

Dr. Sweets I should have a facebook group... *sniff*

Special Agent Tim Sullivan Guess who's back, back again. Sully's back, tell a friend.

Dr. Sweets I'll be your friend. *mutters under breath* maybe he won't make fun of me for thinking the lab is field work.

Special Agent Tim Sullivan Hey kid. Wanna try a bite of my sausage sandwich?

Dr. Sweets Uhm...... Ok!

Special Agent Tim Sullivan How about a peanut. I know I got one in my pants here somewhere *begins patting himself looking for an elusive peanut*

Dr. Goodman ... As entertaining as that is young man. I'm back, isn't that important?

Special Agent Tim Sullivan Hello, I don't think we've met. I'm Sully, I was with Temperance before she left me for Booth.

Dr. Goodman you too huh. *fumbles* I mean eh... Booth is a great guy. *wink*

Doctor Temperance Brennan, Queen of the Liars I stayed for my work.

Angela Montenegro, Princess of Sex on the Job Sweetie, Booth is a part of your work...

Doctor temperance Brenna, Alter Ego Plus we all know that I am not capable of being in a fulfilling relationship at this juncture in time.

Seeley Booth, Player Hey now Goody, you said that was not going to be brought up..again

The Lab Goody?!

Jack Hodgins, King of the Lab and Angela Montenegro Ange... I thought we were in the middle of...

Angela Montenegro, Queen of Multi-tasking Baby, I am using my hands, not my mouth...

Jack Hodgins, King of of ****... everythign Noted. Not complaining.

Dr. Goodman What? Well there was a reason for the sabbatical...

Dr. Brennan, Obliviousness Personified Are we still talking about the penis?

Dr. Goodman No, we're talking about my sabbatical, why does everyone assume that means penis?

Special Agent Tim Sullivan Are we comparing size? Because I think I am up there, literally...

Seely Booth, Formally introduced to Goody's Sabbatical To be fair Goody, that's what you called it.

Seeley Booth, Sex Personified Now Sully, I think we all know who's the biggest...

Dr. Goodman, King of the Large Sabbatical I tend to forget what I say before and after I climax. That's a good night. *Winks at Booth, Brennan, and The Lab*

Angelea Montenegro Yeah, he's not King of the Lab for nothing

The Lab Hey don't drag me into your sexual voyages.

The Lab dude, I'm inanimate

Seeley Booth Oh come on.

Dr. Goodman Come on what may I ask? *wink*

Zach Addy I get it!

Dr. Goodman Get what? The little innuendo?

Seeley Booth Haha innuendo... sounds Italian for 'in your end'

Zach Addy Yes, the innuendo. Contrary to common belief I am not a virgin and as such do understand things like innuendo.

Naomi from Paleontology Hey Zach, you tiger in bed you... ready for some hot, sweaty, steamy passionate animalistic sex tonight. Oh, hello everyone

Princess MOD i love this.....please continue

Angela Montenegro Who's princess mod? Did we get a new addition to the Lab recently that I don't know about? How is that possible?

Princess MOD princess mod would like to play too...

Dr. Goodman I hire without your knowledge. Please, why do you think she *points to Cam* is here?

Dr. Brennan You don't know everything Ange, despite what you may believe. I mean I totally never told you about that time with Booth.

Cam, Queen of Unknown Hires *raises hand in demonstration*

Princess MOD i am working for dr. Goodman

Angela Montenergo *SQUEEL* WHAT DID YOU DO WITH BOOTH OR TO BOOTH?! SHARE EVERYTHING RIGHT NOW/

Dr. Sweets Ah, my own Princess.... So... my girlfriend and I broke up recently...

Seeley Booth Fieldwork doesn't constitue grounds for sex, eh Sweets?

Dr. Brennan Well, you know that time we went to Vegas...

Princess MOD thatl right sweets....i am all yours

Dr. Sweets Does it make you feel better to belittle me, Agent Booth? Do you have a problem with authority figures as well?

Dr. Sweets See... I don't even have to try and they're throwing themselves at me.

Princess MOD because booth is apparently taken

Seeley Booth Rich people, authority figures, all the same. Anyone that makes me look small is a problem. Not that I am small. I am rather large, right Bones?

Dr. Goodman Yes Booth, you are rather large.

Seeley Booth Hey what happens in Vegas stays in Vegas... *whispers in Brennan's ear* or your bedroom, I'm not objecting to that either.

Dr. Brennan, queen of denial I don't know what you're talking about Boothie Boo

Dr. Brennan You mustn't forget your kitchen, my office, the laundry room of my building, your FBI issued vehicle...

Seeley Booth Oh, trust me. I haven't forgotten

Seeley Booth I may have been shouting out lid, that doesn't mean that I had no clue where I was.

Seeley Booth Sorry I was thinking about lid in reference to your panties, and how much I want them off. I wanted to say loud. Freudian slip.

Gordon, Gordon Wyatt Freud! I wrote my thesis on him. Rather interesting fellow...

Angela Montenegro See Hodgie... I told you I heard something coming from her office the other day.

Jack Hodgins, King of the Oblivious During Sex How the hell are you talking right now?

Angela Montenegro, Queen of MUlt-Tasking Remember Well...you... just... have... too...and then... mhmmm

Dr. Jack Hodgins, Ever Suspicious And the morgue...and the janitor's closet...and my office the day before that...you two have been busy, haven't you?

Dr. Brennan Your office?

Cam *tries to sneak off

Special Agent "Sheepish" Booth Actually, Hodgins' offics might have just been me...needed to...ah...release some tension

Angela Montenegro, Gives Up On Closet Sex With Hodgins That's what Bren is for. Sheesh, do I have to tell you two everything?

The Lab Cam, weren't you in Hodgin's office one day this week *whistles innocently*

Special Agent "Sheepish" Booth Em...yeah, actually. How is it you guys avoid the brooms? Coz I gotta say, they get in the way a LOT. One of them got stuck right up...

Camille I thought you were inanimate. And I may have gone in there to discuss work business once or twice, perfectly natural normal behaviour.

Jack Hodgins, All So Not Sheepish Double the penetration, double the pleasure is my motto baby

Cam the Snitch Keep your mouth shut, lab. I could just as easily dish the dirt on you.

Dr. brennan Yeah, that's a real mood killer... I mean.. Booth is so... crappy sex vs. making love that things like that... well you have to ease him into it.

The Lab Hal was my third cousin twice removed from my mother's uncle's stepfather's grandpa's side.

Brennan, the "experienced" one Very true, Hodgins.

Zack Addy How is that possible?

The Lab What dirt Camille? I know what YOU did last night....

Booth, the easily indignant agent I do NOT have to be eased into it! You have to be eased ONTO it!

Dr. Sweets I know what she did too.

Dr. Brennan Why thank you, I do have rather large muscles...

Dr. Sweets *wink, wink*

The Lab Dr. Sweets, please stop pretending. We all know what is in the top drawer of your desk...

Gorden Gorden Oh please...

Seeley Booth *aside to Brennan* Bones, where's the Prepartion H?

Dr. Sweets Now, now, there is no need to bring my lightsaber into this.

Dr. Brennan is that supposed to be some kind of twisted come on?

Dr. Goodman Did someone say sabbatical?

The Lab NO!

Zach Addy Lightsaber? I have a sword.

Speacial Agent Tim Sullivan I found my peanut... and some whipped cream in the process

Jack Hodgins, King of the Lab *groans*

Special Agent Booth Must have been quite a search there, Sull.

Speacial Agent Tim Sullivan Ha ha, yeah I guess...

Dr. Brennan You'd be surprised Booth. I'm just saying that you and he have more in common than you'd like to think.

Zach Addy I like surprises!

The Lab we do not have a KING, we're a democracy... so cease this silly game, you do not rule us. Currently that is Angela's Computer's job.
Hal Lab, I am your father.

Special Agent Tim Sullivan *suddenly enthusiastic* Booth also shares a keen, but perfectly masculine, interest in salsa dancing?

The Lab Arrrrrrrrriba! *Salsa musi starts*

Dr. Sweets Yes, but that does not mean he's any good at it.

The Lab How would you know?

Jack Hodgins, STILL king of the Lab Ange is the best at salsa dancing... any kind of dancing really... she does a mean horizontal Tango.

Hal What, you don't trust computers?

Dr. Sweets It's my job to know these things.

The Lab *stops the salsa music* Daddy?

Angela "Ever Subtle" Montenegro But your impressive third leg is a big help, Hodgie.

Jack Hodgins I trust computers... and I actually believe there is a secret government within our Lab... but I don't have to agree to their terms.

Dr. Brennan, the Oblivious Are we talking about penises again?

Jack Hodgins Yeah, well... Wanna dance? *raises eyebrow*

Zach Addy *deadpan* Did we ever really stop?

Hal *hides ultra top secret government files in a secret hard drive under porn

Jack Hodgins I knew it.

Special Agent Tim Sullivan Hey guys, Cam found a peanut AND cream of wheat in my pants!

Dr. Brennan, the Obvious *loudly, so as not to cause embarrassment* They're talking about having sex.

Jack Hodgins I think I might be sick

Parker "scuse Mister Sullyvan... do you have the Barney bag in your pants?

Angela Montenegro Ah, come here Hodgie... I'll make you feel better.

Agent Seeley Booth Alright, that's it. No more talking about you know what with Parker in the room. Parker did you run away from your mother again?

Parker No, I walked. She's slow.

Agent Seeley Booth she's coming here! Eh, why?

Dr. Sweets Can someone make Sweets feel better?

Camille Saroyan Come 'ere sugar

Dr. Sweets *jumps*

Agent Seeley Booth Hey guys... come on... he's a lot quicker than his mother, he's gonna pick up on things. It won't be pretty.

Camille Saroyan and Dr. Sweets *passionately make out and head for Cam's office*

Agent Seeley Booth you haven't seen an angry Rebecca... I have and I'd like to avoid repeating the scene.

Agent Seeley Booth *covers parkers eyes* Damnit

Seeley Booth I feel pretty, so pretty and witty and..

Dr. Brennan Sex rarely is

Agent Seeley Booth not you too Bones... come on.

Dr. Brennan Gladly. *hops on Booth's back*

Dr. Brennan I am Wonder Woman... weeeeeeeeeee!

Parker I want a piggyback ride too!

Angela Montenagro don't we all.

Jack, super suave, Hodgins Well all you gotta do is ask baby. Hop on.

Dr. Brennan Booth, you're back is rather boring... I'd rather be in the front

Rebecca...THE EX Parker...*winded* I told you to slow down....*takes in the scene* WTF!... I mean... What is going on here, Booth

Seeley Booth Baby, you're making this really HARD on me.

flyersfan35

Posted 10/12/2007 07:02:13 AM

Hehe....you all are hilarious!! One things for certain...it's never dull around here!!

Oh, and btw....I will accept the checks, but you can keep the complaints...lol!

Wait a minute!! The damn ghost edited the part about the checks....Actually, you can just send the checks to the authors...they deserve it! I can't remember the last time I laughed so much...

DBAngelfan

Posted 11/12/2007 01:12:00 AM

ROFL!!! You are all awesome Extra points for CSI cross Keep going pleeeeeassseeee? I see more in the chatbox