THE LIFE OF EMILY ERIN - K+ - Family, Angst - 4th of the series-Meegs

cheesebk:

aw, poor emily.. and parker is all concerned, too...

please update soon!

Thanks ladies! And no, fab, I am afraid there has been no DB. On we go:
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Dr. Wasson led Booth and Brennan across the hall to the empty waiting room. He sat in a chair and the parents followed suit.

“The results of the CBC show an abnormally large amount of white blood cells in your daughter’s blood,” Dr. Wasson began. “The CT scan showed an enlarged spleen and stomach as well as swelling around the middle of Emily’s spinal cord.”

“What does that mean?” Booth asked as he clenched his jaw and awaited the doctor’s explanation.

“Are you thinking it could be leukemia?” Brennan asked outright, glaring at Dr. Wasson. Booth’s head spun towards his wife and then over to the doctor. He wasn’t quite sure he had heard correctly…leukemia?

“It is a possibility given these results, yes. The EEG results are not in yet, but the seizure Emily experienced would indicate that it has spread to her central nervous system,” Dr. Wasson explained as he looked between both parents. “There are more tests to be done, like a bone marrow aspiration, to be 100% certain. She will probably need to have her spleen removed, however.”

Booth’s heart stopped…at least that’s how it felt. Every part of him froze, except for his right hand, which found its way to Brennan’s left and squeezed.

“Then the next step is to find an oncologist,” Brennan replied, her eyes darting to Booth for a second as she returned the squeeze.

“Yes, that’s the other thing I wanted to tell you. Our top oncologist should be here-“

The door opened and a tall, slightly rotund man walked in.

“Ah, here he is,” Dr. Wasson exclaimed as he jumped from his seat to greet the man.

“This is Dr. Thomas Nyland, head of oncology here at Georgetown,” Dr. Wasson initiated the introductions.

Both Booth and Brennan rose from their seats.

“Pleasure to meet you both,” Dr. Nyland said as he shook Booth’s hand.

“Thank you, doctor,” Booth said, glancing over at Brennan, who looked like she could kill someone.

“I’m sorry, but we’ll be going to Johns Hopkins, thank you,” Brennan replied curtly. “I would like to get her transferred as soon as possible so we can get the bone marrow aspiration done quickly,” Brennan continued, her arms folded tightly across her chest.

“Bones, what are you talking about?” Booth asked his wife, now quite confused.

“It’s in the top three in the nation for pediatrics and cancer. I want Emily to go there,” Brennan replied.

“We don’t even know for sure if she has cancer. I mean, you said there are more tests to be done, right?” Booth asked as he turned to Dr. Wasson, fear in his eyes.

“Why do you think he’s bringing in an oncologist, Booth?” Brennan asked him.

For this, he had no answer. She was right. His jaw clenched once again and he conceded.

“Mr. and Mrs. Booth, I can assure you that Dr. Nyland is-“ Dr. Wasson began.

“With all due respect, this has nothing to do with the expertise of Dr. Nyland. I want Emily to get the very best and I know she will at Johns Hopkins,” Brennan replied, nodding to Dr. Nyland at the mention of his name.

“Mrs. Booth-“ Dr. Wasson began again.

“Actually, it’s DOCTOR Brennan and I would like for you to get her transfer organized,” Brennan interrupted and she turned to leave.

“Well…Dr. Brennan, Johns Hopkins IS one of the best and there aren’t any spaces available in their childhood cancer center,” Dr. Nyland tried to explain.

“Trust me, there will be after I get off the phone,” Brennan replied, her eyes knife-like as she glanced one last time at the doctors before turning on her heel and exiting the waiting room.

Booth stood for a moment with the doctors staring at him and then he left as well. Brennan was about to open Emily’s door when Booth caught her.

“Are you sure about this?” Booth asked her as he stopped just outside Emily’s room.

“I know the chief of surgery. He can get her in tomorrow,” Brennan informed Booth.

“Okay, good then,” he replied, his hands on his hips.

Brennan turned the handle to Emily’s room door, but Booth’s hand stopped her. She looked to him.

“Is this…really happening? I mean, is this for sure? Our…Emily has…leukemia? Maybe they messed up with the tests. Shouldn’t we have them do them again?” Booth asked Brennan, his voice quivering and his eyes darting around. He couldn’t believe that a 6 year old little girl…HIS little girl…could have something so terrible.

Brennan’s face softened for the first time since hearing the news. She had immediately gone into doctor/scientist mode and wanted to find the fastest way to make her daughter better.

“Actually, it makes sense, Booth. She’s been fighting an infection, she’s been bruising to the touch, she’s vomited, she hasn’t wanted to eat anything, and she’s been bleeding easily,” Brennan explained before closing her eyes for a few moments, silently kicking herself for not realizing it sooner. “These are all signs of childhood leukemia. I just didn’t put it together; I thought she was just playing hard at school and sick from the cake because every kid gets sick, right? I mean, she’s just a little girl, she’s supposed to get bumps and bruises and…” Brennan’s voice heightened in the middle of her rant and then trailed off as Booth pulled her into his arms. She sighed as a pair of tears fell from her eyes.

“Whatever you think we need to do, we’ll do,” Booth said as he squeezed her gently.

Brennan pulled out of the embrace, her eyes glistening.

“I need to get on the phone to Johns Hopkins. There are more tests to be done and I want them done there,” Brennan replied.

“Alright, then let’s do it,” Booth said as he gave her an encouraging look.

They both turned for the hospital room, each of their hearts breaking inside.
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Don't throw things at me! *ducks* It's JUST getting interesting...

dbangelfan:

I won't throw anything but I hope you post more soon.

libster:

this story is kinda sad please dont let emily die. i like it though ill read it anyway but i prefer for her not to die

cheesebk:

leukemia... oh that poor little kid!!!

Tozika:

I'm really tempted to throw things at you right now.
Poor little girl and her family.....I hope it's one of the not so bad forms of leukemia.....
And you know, that you can't let her die, right?

fab:

Ok, I won't be throwing anything....yet!
But you're right, it is getting interesting..

more and like soon please
hugs woman
fab

I know, it's been like FOREVER. I had my play and my Mom and aunt and cousin and mother-in-law here and they just left yesterday. CRAZINESS!!! Anyway, I hope you all are still interested 'cuz here's the next chapter:
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CHAPTER 9

Brennan was right. After one phone call, Emily had a room awaiting her arrival at Johns Hopkins Hospital in Baltimore. The top oncologist for childhood leukemia would be meeting with the entire family at 10 o’clock.

It was now 5:16 in the morning and Emily was thankfully still sleeping soundly, as was Parker. Brennan slouched in the hospital room chair, her eyes fixated on Emily, who was lying on her right side, Care Bear nestled closely between her arms. Her mouth lay half open, an indication to Brennan that she was in a deep sleep. *Thank God* Brennan thought to herself. The ethereal reference didn’t even register. She had taken her hair down and it lay messily about her shoulders. She had also removed her necklace, but she subconsciously traced her right index finger across her sternum as though playing with the pendant. She was also barefoot as her 2 inch heels had become unbearably uncomfortable hours ago. She sighed loudly.

A moment later, the door opened quietly and Booth walked in and stopped next to his wife, laying a hand on her shoulder and squeezing.

“Everything is set. They will discharge her before 8, so we should have plenty of time to make it up to Baltimore. I’ve called you in sick. The TA will take over,” Booth whispered as he looked down at Brennan, whose eyes still hadn’t left Emily. “I’ll run by the house and get us a change of clothes,” he added.

Brennan was in a daze. She had heard every word Booth had said, but it hadn’t really processed in her brain.

“Temperance?” Booth said after nearly a minute had passed. His touch was soft on her shoulder once again as he began to rub her neck.

Suddenly, Brennan’s blackberry began vibrating on the nearby table. Booth stepped over and grabbed it, checking the caller ID before handing it to her.

“It’s Angela,” Booth said as Brennan took the phone.

She stood, her evening gown hanging from her shoulders and wrinkling against her skin. She glanced at Booth, who gave her one final squeeze on the neck before she left the room.

“Hi, Ang,” Brennan said as the door closed behind her.

He watched her go and then looked to his son and then to his daughter. He had been awake for nearly 24 hours and would probably be awake for another 24, but he didn’t care. His mind was racing in a million different directions and he was trying to sort out his thoughts. The top priority was obvious: get Emily the best medical treatment possible…and they were doing that. But as they waited for her to be released from Georgetown and transferred to Johns Hopkins, his mind wandered to the worst possible scenario: *our little girl could die. At age 6, our beautiful, creative, bubbly, and “spunky” little girl could leave this earth far too early.* The tension in his body had been building and it was reaching its boiling point. *NO! Dammit! This isn’t fair!* His jaw clenched and his eyes narrowed and he punched the wall with his right hand, his knuckles cracking audibly at the sudden trauma. He almost didn’t feel it…it was like a dullness, a sensation that wasn’t really there…numb. That was the word that summed it up.

He recoiled his hand and subconsciously rubbed it as he stepped towards Emily’s bed and kissed her on her temple. She shifted slightly, but she didn’t wake up.

A moment later, Brennan reappeared and set the phone back on the table.

“Angela is going to bring our clothes and Emily’s present. She said she’d tell Ms. Stinson that Emily is sick. She should be here in a little bit,” Brennan informed Booth, her voice tired and raspy. “I thought I’d let them sleep as long as possible,” Brennan whispered, gesturing to Parker and Emily with her head.

Booth’s muscle began to loosen in his temple and his hand began to throb and he continued to rub it, sure to keep it out of Brennan’s view.

“Rufus, no…” Emily whispered suddenly as she shifted from her side to her back.

Booth and Brennan’s attention shot to their daughter, who was still fast asleep. Clearly, she was dreaming and both parents’ heart rates returned to normal once they realized this.

“Maybe we should step out,” Booth suggested.

“We said one of us would always be here to watch her,” Brennan countered.

“We need to talk about this before we wake them up, which is going to be soon,” Booth said gently.

Brennan considered this for a moment and as much as she didn’t want to leave Emily’s side, she knew that they needed to discuss exactly how they were going to break the news to their kids.

She sighed deeply. “Alright.”

Once they reached the waiting room, Booth collapsed into one of the chairs. Brennan remained standing, her arms folded across her chest and her eyes fixed on her husband. He raised his eyes to meet hers and they gazed intently at each other for a long few moments, both of them trying to put all of this into perspective…and both of them failing miserably.

“How are we…what do we say to her?” Booth asked the question of the year. “I mean, how do you tell a 6 year old she’s sick with something that she probably can’t even understand?” he added, frowning as his eyes darted across Brennan’s face, hoping and praying she would have the answer.

Brennan wore a pained expression, one that was becoming all too familiar to both her and to Booth.

“She’s incredibly bright for her age. I think she’ll understand it more than we might think,” Brennan replied as she shifted her weight from one foot to the other, her knees cracking as she moved.

“Yeah, but…what do we say? And Parker? Should we wait until after the aspiration is done? Or should we tell both of them now? Should we tell them together or apart? With the doctor? Without? What do we do?!” Booth questioned, his voice rising steadily with fear and uncertainty.

“We don’t have all of the tests done, so we don’t know everything yet. Right now, all she needs to know is that she’s sick and that the doctors are going to make her better. And we have to be sure that she knows that she can talk to us about anything she is feeling. When Angela gets here, maybe you could tell Parker? That way he at least knows what’s going on when we tell Emily,” Brennan said, calmly…a little too calmly for her liking. “I’ve seen how this can affect families, but I have never known the patient to be a child,” Brennan replied, sighing loudly.

“Yeah, I can explain things to Parker,” Booth agreed.

“Okay, then we will all talk as a family…she just needs to know that Mommy and Daddy will always be there for her,” Brennan added, her voice and bottom lip quivering ever so slightly.

Booth’s anxiety eased for a few moments as Brennan spoke…and a thought occurred to him that he hadn’t been able to access quite yet due to the brain fog that had followed “the news.”

“Maybe I could talk to Cullen,” Booth suggested, glancing up at Brennan. “Amy was older when she was diagnosed, but maybe he might have some thoughts.” He didn’t want to think for another instant that Emily could die, but Cullen was the only person they knew who had experienced the exact same thing the two of them were going through at this very minute.

“I don’t even want to think about that,” Brennan replied, closing her eyes and shaking her head for a moment. It was too painful. Amy hadn’t made it…and she could not bear to think that Emily wouldn’t either. Emily would beat this.

“I know…” Booth began, but his voice trailed off as the thought evaporated.

Brennan dropped her arms and walked the few feet to Booth, knelt down, and placed her hands on his knees. She brushed the tops of his legs as she looked into his eyes. He stared at her, his breathing steadying at the look in her eyes.

“We’re her parents. We’ll find the right words,” Brennan said, simply, even though she knew it was anything but.

Booth placed his hands on the tops of hers and leaned his head down to touch her forehead. They both closed their eyes, resting their heads against one another as the rise and fall of their chests fell into rhythm and their hands interlocked. They sat in that position for a long while, each of them listening to the other’s breathing…each of them trying to gather the strength they would need for the challenge that lay ahead.
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There you are! More to come soon...and soon means sooner than this post 'cuz my play is done and I am pretty sure I have more time

Tozika:

That's so sad....I can't believe that you let them suffer so much.....please make it all better soon.....

Cheese:

sorry for the late review, meegs...

Great update, but depressing... I hope things will get better for the little girl soon

Thanks, Cheese. Just a quick note: you all should know that I do not like character death fanfic. So, with that said, I will post the next chap:
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CHAPTER 10

“Hey, buddy. Psst. Wake up,” Booth whispered to his son, shaking him gently.

Parker’s eyes squinted and he glanced up at his dad. He blinked a few times and brushed his blonde ringlets out of his eyes.

“Wh-what’s going on? Is Emily okay?” Parker asked, groggily.

“Yeah. She’s still sleeping and you and I need to talk. We need to step out so we don’t wake Em up,” Booth explained.

“What time is it?” Parker asked as he sat up on the cot.

“Almost 6. Mom is out talking to Angela,” Booth whispered. “Get dressed quick, kay?”

5 minutes later, the Booth boys were sitting across from Emily’s door in 2 chairs they had pulled out of the waiting room.

“What’s up, Dad?” Parker asked, now fully alert.

Booth looked to his son and leaned his elbows on his knees, his hands folded in front of him. He glanced down at the floor before looking back to Parker.

Parker stared at his dad. “It’s bad, isn’t it?” He asked. But he knew.

“Yeah, bud,” Booth replied, his face somber.

“What is it?” Parker asked.

“Emily has leukemia. You know what that is, right?” Booth replied.

“Yeah. Cancer,” Parker responded, a gloomy tone in his voice.

“The doctors still have to do more tests, but we have to go to Baltimore. We’re leaving here soon. School’s not open yet, but I am going to call you in sick. We all need to be together right now,” Booth explained.

“Yeah, I wanna be with her right now,” Parker replied.

Booth smiled. “I know you wanted to make it to football tryouts, but I’ll talk to the coach, ‘kay?” Booth said.

“Yeah, okay,” Parker replied. He did really want to make it to tryouts, but after seeing Emily have that seizure, his mind was almost completely focused on her. And if taking care of her meant missing football tryouts, then so be it.

Father and son sat for a few moments in silence. Booth watched Parker tap his foot on the ground, his gaze fixed on his own lap. He knew Parker needed to process the information. Hell, HE was still processing the information. So, he didn’t say anything. They just sat…until Parker spoke.

“Is Emily…is she gonna die?” Parker asked, worry spreading across his face.

Booth couldn’t answer at first. “The doctors are going to do everything they can and we are getting her the best treatment out there. She’s going to have to take medicine every day and she might get really sick from it,” Booth continued to explain.

“Like chemotherapy?” Parker asked.

“Yeah, bud. Exactly. And we all have to help her through all of it. I know you’ll be good at that ‘cause you’re such a great big brother,” Booth replied, smiling softly at his son.

Parker was silent for a few moments. He glanced down at the floor and then back at his father.

“Why does God do this?” Parker asked, a large frown overtaking his face.

“I don’t know, Park,” was all Booth could say…because he had already pushed the same thought out of his mind more than a dozen times.

“I mean, it’s not fair. She’s…little and…smart and just…why would he do that? She doesn’t deserve it!” Parker exclaimed. He could feel the water rise behind his eyes.

“Park, bud, I know. God doesn’t do this on purpose. He presents us with many challenges in life and this-“ Booth began to explain, but couldn’t finish.

“But it’s not fair! Why can’t he give cancer to some old guy somewhere? Why does it have to be Emily?! What did she ever do to Him?” Parker exclaimed, the tears spilling onto his cheeks as he stood from his chair.

Booth regarded his son for a moment and he stood and clasped his hand on Parker’s shoulder.

“Hey, hey. I know this is hard-“ Booth couldn’t finish again.

“Yeah, it is and it’s just not fair!” Parker exclaimed, his fists clenching tightly as his fingernails dug into his palms.

Booth squeezed Parker’s shoulder and looked him straight in the eye.

“We are all together on this, okay? I know it’s not fair, but we have to help Emily fight this. We have to help her win,” Booth said, his eyes never leaving his son’s.

Parker glanced away from his dad, his fists still balled up and tears still running down his cheeks. He felt like kicking something.

“It’s okay to be mad,” Booth told him. “I already punched the wall,” he added, his face severe.

Parker’s attention snapped quickly back to his father’s. He hadn’t expected that, but he knew that his dad was telling the truth. As he looked in his dad’s eyes, his tears began to slow and his breathing calmed. He released the tension in his fists and brushed the palms of his hands with his fingertips, feeling the indentations his nails had made. A moment later, he brushed his cheeks.

“Okay, I’m ready to help her fight,” Parker finally replied.

Booth let out his breath and pulled Parker into a hug. Moments passed as father and son stood in each other’s embrace, both praying for God to make this right.
************************************************************************
“Thanks, Ang,” Brennan said as the two women grabbed plastic coffee cups and filled them with the brown liquid that would get them through the day. They each took a seat in the waiting room.

“Have you talked to Russ yet?” Angela asked as she took a sip of the watery excuse for coffee.

“No. I’ll call him after we see the oncologist. Haley was sick again yesterday, so he has his own ailing child to take care of,” Brennan responded and she took a sip as well.

“Is there anything else you need? I can get Parker’s homework from school and I can talk to Goodman and go and get Rufus…anything, just say it,” Angela said as she reached for Brennan’s hand and squeezed. A tear trickled out of her left eye.

Brennan managed a small smile. Angela truly was the best friend a girl could ask for.

“I know, Angela. You are the best,” Brennan replied.

After a few moments, Angela released her grip on Brennan and brushed away her tear.

She sighed. “What are you going to tell her?” she inquired.

Brennan paused for a moment. “That she’s sick and the doctors are going to make her better. Because that’s the truth,” she replied, simply once again.

“And Booth is talking to Parker right now?” Angela asked, rhetorically, because she knew full well that he was doing so. She just needed something to say to keep from breaking down into tears.

Brennan knew this, but she nodded and after another few moments, she reached forward and embraced Angela.

“We are going to get through this. Please don’t worry about me, Ang,” Brennan said as she hugged.

A pair of tears spilled onto Angela’s cheeks and she pulled out of the embrace.

“Yeah, right. Like that’s gonna happen,” she said as she wiped the water away.

Brennan pursed her lips ever so slightly.

“Well, at least try to worry…less?” she replied in a questioning tone as if it would convince her best friend.

Angela glared at her and both women knew that Brennan was asking the impossible. As the realization sunk in, Angela leaned her head on Brennan’s shoulder and sighed, placing her left hand on Brennan’s right.

They sat together in silence for a long while …Brennan thinking about the move to Johns Hopkins and about what she and Booth would say to their daughter. She knew they would find the right words, but it was difficult, nonetheless. It was difficult to actually SAY the words because saying them out loud to Emily meant admitting that this was the truth…and THAT was what scared Brennan to death. She kept her mind from wandering to the “what if,” but it was allowed entrance to the “how will she handle this” area. Brennan imagined Emily throwing up and Emily losing her hair and Emily asking why she wasn’t getting better. *But she WILL get better!* Brennan shouted at herself. *Focus on getting her better* Her mind finally set its course on determination.

Angela felt Brennan’s muscle tense a bit and she knew that she must be scared out of her mind…even if she wasn’t willing to admit it. Her heart ached for her best friend and she couldn’t imagine how she would react if Davey were in this situation. And then she thought about how DAVEY was going to react to Emily’s sickness. At least he was still young enough not to completely understand it. Angela thought about Parker. He was old enough to understand and this was his sister. It was going to be hard on him, Angela already knew. She and Hodgins would need to spend extra time with him. But Bren? *What about Bren?* Angela thought. She knew she was strong, *but dear God, is she THIS strong?* she asked herself. And another tear came to her eye. Before it was able to escape, Brennan broke the silence.

“Booth and I should probably go wake Emily up. Angela, thank you for bringing all of our stuff,” Brennan said as she rose from the chair.

“Will you quit thanking me? What am I, the hired help?” Angela retorted, standing next to Brennan.

Brennan would have rolled her eyes had it been any other situation.

“I’ll call you later,” Brennan informed Angela as she started out of the room.

“Okay, sweetie. I love you,” Angela said and she stole one last hug.

“I love you, too,” Brennan replied, closing her eyes as she squeezed.

“Tell Booth I love him, too, okay?” Angela said.

“Of course. Talk to you in a little bit,” Brennan replied.

Angela smiled softly and blew Brennan a kiss as she turned left to follow the hallway to the exit.

Brennan watched her go and stood for a long few moments…thinking. About everything she had already thought about and she would think about again in the days, weeks, and months to come.
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Stick with me, I've got more written and I am writing more!

cheese:

awesome update, meegs... but still... poor little emily

temperancerose:

More! Please!!!!! Please make her get better!

Tozika: Good to read, that you won't let her die.
But I'm still a little afraid of what they will have to go through.

fab:

**fab slides in a day late and a dollar short**
I'm here, I'm here...work is shit lately...

Chapter 9 was awesome...I loved Booth and Bren's talk..how tender..poor em and park
and Bren's gonna be pissed when she see's his hand lol

Chapter 10 was also good...Park and Booth's talk was so emotional....
Ang and Bren's talk left a little something in my eye...sweet....she's such a good friend..

more please
fab

libster:

finally!!! i love this story its so real kee em coming PLEASE!!!

Thanks, ladies! Glad to see ya back, fab! On we go:
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CHAPTER 11

“Am I gonna die?” Emily asked, looking up to her parents, both of whom sat on the edges of her bed.

“No, pumpkin, of course not,” Booth answered quickly, smiling as he squeezed his daughter’s shoulder. He was now free of the tuxedo and dressed in jeans and a t-shirt. Brennan wore jeans and a cotton, long sleeved shirt.

Brennan cast a sideways glance at him, not certain that he should have said that since they could make no promises.

“Is the medicine gonna be ickier than my cold medicine?” Emily asked, clearly quite concerned about the “ickiness” level.

“It will be different, baby. Some medicine, you’ll swallow, but most of it will be given to you through your veins just like right now with the needle in your arm,” Brennan explained as her finger traced the IV all the way up to the bag hanging above Emily’s head.

Emily’s gaze followed her mother’s finger up to the bag.

“So, I won’t be able to taste it?” Emily inquired, looking back to her mother.

“Nope. Not at all,” Brennan replied, smiling softly at her daughter.

Emily considered this for a few moments, her eyes narrowed slightly as her brain took in the information.

“Well, that’s good ‘cause Parker, you were right, it didn’t really taste like cherry,” Emily replied, shaking her head and looking at her brother with wide eyes.

“Told ya,” Parker replied, smiling brightly. He and his dad had had a good talk and he understood what was going on and although he was scared, he wasn’t about to let his sister see his fear. She was particularly good at noticing things like that, so this was proving to be a difficult task for him.

“So, I have to have another test, but I’ll be asleep for it?” Emily asked, wanting to make sure she had all of the details straight after her parents had told her about the bone marrow aspiration. Of course, they hadn’t used those words.

“Yeah, pumpkin, you won’t remember a thing. You’ll just go to sleep for a little bit and when you wake up, you’ll get lots of pudding and popsicles. How does that sound?” Booth replied, smiling hugely as he reached forward and tapped Emily on the nose.

She smiled. “That sounds yummy,” she replied.

This was going well…as Brennan had expected due to their daughter’s above average intelligence. She seemed to understand things in a way none of her friends did. Prior to Emily entering kindergarten, Brennan had considered getting her IQ tested, but Booth had convinced her to wait, saying “we can wait a few years to find out she really is a genius.” The hard part was yet to come. It would be an entirely different story when Emily was throwing up from the chemo; when she was losing her hair; when she had to miss school so much; when her friends were wondering what was going on; when Emily started asking when she was going to get better. All of those things would come in stride, but Brennan could already see it all. She couldn’t help it, her mind just raced with the thoughts of the impact Emily’s illness would eventually have on her. The anxiety gripped onto her chest and her heart felt like a small animal caught in a fur trap. She tried to live in the moment…and at this moment, her Emily was smiling and laughing as Parker told a joke. But what would happen in the moment that her Emily was so exhausted from the treatment that she was crying from the pain? What would she do then? There would be no smiling and no laughing…only anguish. Brennan could take it and she knew her Emily was strong. But this was a whole different story…this was something entirely new…to each of them. They would make it through as a family, but what if Emily didn’t make it? *NO! Stop it! She WILL make it!*

“Ah, the whole family is here,” Dr. Wasson appeared in the doorway, shattering Brennan’s thoughts into a million pieces.

Nervously, she glanced over at him.

“I have just signed off on Emily’s chart. The nurse should be in in a minute to remove the IV and then you all are free to go,” Dr. Wasson explained, smiling softly.

“Thank you, Dr. Wasson. We appreciate everything,” Booth said as he stood to shake hands with the young doctor.

“Hope you feel better soon, Emily,” Dr. Wasson said, his smile widening.

“Thanks, docta. Me, too,” she replied.

“And good luck at Johns Hopkins,” he said, nodding his head slightly at Brennan.

“Thank you,” Brennan replied, her face soft but full of worry.

Dr. Wasson nodded once more and left the family to themselves.

“Pumpkin, you want to open your special present now?” Booth asked Emily, smiling brightly.

“Yeah!” Emily said as her eyes lit up.

“Alright, Mommy has it,” Booth said, looking to Brennan, who had just snapped out of her reverie.

“Here it is, baby,” Brennan replied as she grabbed the present from the table and stood next to Booth, handing the pink and purple wrapped gift to her daughter.

It was thin and square shaped and almost looked like a large, padded envelope, aside from the wrapping.

“What is it?” Emily asked, scrunching her nose as she shook the gift.

“Open it, silly!” Parker instructed, still smiling at his sister.

Emily tore into the paper and 5 seconds later, she had it open. Her expression shifted to one of confusion.

“What is it?” she asked, holding up the pink envelope.

“Keep opening,” Parker instructed again.

Booth and Brennan stole a glance from each other, their faces more solemn than excited. They had wanted this moment to be really special and they had wanted Emily to truly be able to enjoy her gift. Now, they didn’t know if she possibly could.

Emily ripped open the envelope and pulled out its belongings: a card in the shape of a horse. The horse was a brown color and had an English saddle on its back and a bridle on its head. It also wore a giant smile, revealing huge teeth. It read: “We Love You, Emily. Love, Mom, Dad, & Parker.”

Emily laughed and then began to read, "We...Lo-love...you, Emily. Love, Mom, Dad, and...Par-par-k-ker," she said, beaming up at her parents. She had started reading at the end of pre-school and was ahead of all of her classmates.

Emily smiled. Then, after another moment, her expression changed back to confusion. “But how is this my gift?” she asked, perplexed.

Brennan smiled. “We couldn’t really wrap up a horse, baby, so we gave you that card. You start horseback riding lessons next week!” Brennan explained, smiling widely as she reached down and tickled Emily.

Emily laughed and playfully batted her mother’s hand away. “Really?! I’m gonna ride horsies?!” Emily asked, looking to both of her parents, her blue eyes wide and sparkling.

“That’s right, angel. A little pony named Roxie can’t wait to meet you,” Booth told her, leaning down and tapping her on the nose.

“Cool! That’s the best birfday present EVER!” Emily exclaimed as she bounced in the bed.

“Careful, baby,” Brennan said as she reached for Emily’s IV arm and pressed against it, trying to calm down her vivacious daughter.

Emily stopped bouncing and grinned up at her parents.

“Thank you, Mommy and Daddy,” she said as she brushed her curls away from her face. “And you too, Parker,” she added, turning to look at her brother.

“You’re welcome, Emmy,” Parker replied as he reached forward and gave Emily a hug.

Booth and Brennan glanced at each other once more, their smiles fading ever so slightly. This had been their baby’s dream…to ride horses. They had found a horse trainer who could start teaching Emily and they had set up a lesson for her. And now they had no idea if she was going to be able to do it.

Apparently, Emily was thinking along the same lines. As she pulled out of Parker’s embrace, her face wrinkled again.

“But wait. If I’m sick, can I still ride Roxie?” Emily asked, clearly concerned.

Another glance at each other and then Booth spoke.

“How about we see how you’re feeling next week, alright, pumpkin? And if you don’t feel like it, then you can ride her later,” Booth bargained with her.

Emily thought about this for a moment.

“Okay. I hope I feel TONS better though,” Emily replied, hopefully, her eyes widening in a dramatic fashion.

“We do too, sweetheart,” Booth replied. He leaned in and kissed Emily on her forehead. “We do, too.”
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Still good? Let me know! More soon!

libster:

oh how cute. i love your writing. i hope emily lives and gets to go horse riding.

Tozika:

I hope she can at least once ride Roxie before she's getting worse from the chemo....then she will have something to look forward to do again when she is better....
Parker is really doing well with not showing his fear....he is a very brave big brother....

Meegs:

Thanks for the reviews, ladies! Fab, where are ya, woman? You must be busy with the real world, but I know you'll get caught up. So, on we go:
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CHAPTER 12

Dr. Michelle Caldwell walked into room 427, where she was greeted by a man, a woman, a boy, and a little girl. She smiled and focused her attention on the little girl.

“You…must be Emily,” Dr. Caldwell said as she extended her arm towards Emily, who was sitting on the hospital bed.

Emily looked to her parents and after seeing them smiling, she took Dr. Caldwell’s hand and shook it vigorously.

“That’s some grip you’ve got there. You’re tough, aren’t you?” Dr. Caldwell asked, winking and smiling.

“Yup!” Emily exclaimed. “Are you the docta that’s gonna stick a needle in me so you can look at my bone mawwow?” Emily asked, a curious and skeptical look in her eye.

Dr. Caldwell smiled again. “Aren’t you a smart one? Yup, that’s me. But you’ll be asleep, so you won’t feel a thing,” she replied.

“Yeah, Mommy told me that. Mommy’s a docta, too, but she doesn’t work at a hospotal,” Emily explained.

“Is that so? And you must be Mommy,” Dr. Caldwell replied, turning to Brennan and offering her a hand.

“Yes and this is my husband, Seeley and our son, Parker,” Brennan said after taking the doctor’s hand.

Dr. Caldwell exchanged pleasantries with Booth and Parker and quickly set her attention back on Emily.

“Alright, Emily. Since you know so much about your special test, how ‘bout we get you ready for it? You have an extra cool gown to wear,” Dr. Caldwell told Emily with a smile.

“Really? I get to dress up for my test?” Emily inquired, looking quite puzzled.

“Yup. The gown is right over there in the cabinet,” Dr. Caldwell informed her and pointed across the room to a cabinet and dresser.

“’Kay! Mommy, can I go get it?” Emily asked.

“Daddy will get it for you,” Booth replied and he strode across the room to grab the “extra cool” hospital gown.

“What time is the test taking place?” Brennan asked Dr. Caldwell.

“She is scheduled for 11:30. We’ll get her down there by 11,” Dr. Caldwell replied.

“Hey, look at this, Em! It’s got unicorns on it!” Booth exclaimed, sitting on the edge of the bed and handing the gown to Emily.

“Cool! And it’s hot pink!” Emily exclaimed, clearly quite thrilled with her new wardrobe item.

Brennan smiled down at them. “Em, why don’t you and Daddy work on getting you dressed for the test while the doctor and I go talk? Sound good?” Brennan asked her daughter.

“Yeah, Mommy. Sounds good!” Emily replied, her eyes sparkling as they always did.

“Okay. We’ll be back soon,” Brennan said as she looked at Booth, who gave her a knowing look.

“See you in a little bit, Emily,” Dr. Caldwell said, waving.

Emily waved right back. “Okay, docta-docta…wait, what’s your name?” Emily asked.

“You can call me Michelle,” she replied.

“’Kay, Michelle,” Emily replied as she picked up the gown to inspect it further.

The two doctors let the door close behind them as they stepped into the hallway.

“What do you think given the test results?” Brennan asked her, not wanting to waste any time.

“As I am sure Georgetown told you, she has an elevated number of white blood cells. These are specifically gathering around her spleen, which most likely means that her spleen will have to be removed. The aspiration will tell us definitively. We wouldn’t want to perform an unnecessary surgery, especially a splenectomy since the spleen is a vital part of the immune system,” Dr. Caldwell explained, very calmly and matter-of-factly. “And the EEG results confirm that she had a tonic clonic seizure, although it didn’t take a doctor to figure that out. It has most likely spread to her central nervous system, although without the remaining tests, we cannot know for sure.”

Brennan knew all of this. “Where does that put us?” she asked, her brain wanting a prognosis, even though she knew it would take time.

Dr. Caldwell regarded Brennan for a moment. She was savvy and she could see that Brennan meant business and she wasn’t going to settle for just knowing the basics. This was not going to be a typical “parent” case. After all, she was a doctor herself.

“You want me to be straight with you, am I correct, Dr. Brennan?” she asked, her eyes unwavering as she looked at Brennan.

“Yes, 100%,” Brennan replied, her gaze unfaltering.

“I would like to do a physical exam to see just how enlarged her spleen is, but she will need her spleen removed tonight or tomorrow morning. That means she will need to be on a higher dose of antibiotics to fight off infection. The seizure tells me that the CNS is involved and that means a more aggressive treatment plan, which we need to begin as soon as possible. I cannot say whether she has AML or ALL, however, given her current state, my guess would be T-cell ALL. We will have all of the results in this afternoon,” Dr. Caldwell explained.

Brennan listened intently, her arms folded across her chest and her eyes steadied on the oncologist. Brennan knew some about leukemia and what she did know was that if both the spleen AND the central nervous system were infected, the prognosis was not good. Her heart wrenched inside her chest and the tingling began creeping down her arms and to her fingers where it burst in her palms, desperately wanting to break free.

“I don’t know much about leukemia, I’m an anthropologist. But I do know that once the CNS is affected, the outlook isn’t good,” Brennan blurted, not realizing what she was saying until she had actually said it.

“Generally, that’s true. But it all depends on the patient. Her blood count, her age, her general health, her race, her leukemia subtype, her chromosomes…her attitude. Dr. Brennan, I know this is frightening. But I also know that a good doctor doesn’t jump to a conclusion and I intend on treating Emily’s cancer with the assumption that she is going to beat it. I can tell she’s one tough cookie. And that helps…A LOT,” Dr. Caldwell replied, her voice calm as she broke a small smile.

Aside from the cookie comment, Brennan understood what Dr. Caldwell was saying: fight like hell. And that is what she planned to do. Brennan looked into the doctor’s eyes and found determination. Reassured, she sighed and shifted her jaw.

“Alright, then let’s get started with the tests,” Brennan replied and she turned for Emily’s room.

Just as her hand hit the doorknob, the door flew open and Booth nearly knocked Brennan over.

“She’s seizing again!” Booth exclaimed, his face as white as a ghost.
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I know it's a cliffie, but don't freak out yet! More soon!

cheesebk:

uh-uh... cliffie much!!!!! gah, you're mean, meegs

can't wait for the update!!

libster:

oh whats going to happen next. love it love you ha ha
keep em coming

Tozika:

oohhh that doesn't sound to good.....
Another seizure and the CNS is affected too....

But you said you wouldn't let her die....and I trust you to not lie to your readers....so everything will be okay in the end.....

temperance rose:

aww poor Brennan, sometimes she's to clever for her own good *huggles*, let Emily be well soon!

fab:

Chapter 11 review:

Loved it...fabulous...god, I always wanted an adorable princessy little girl...dammit...missed that one...
Of course she's smart....Bren
Of course she's gorgeous....Booth
Loved her gift...and Roxie? Cute..

onto next chap
sorry for lateness, I was out-of-town

hugs mdawg
luvs
fab