jokes ! post em here - PG13 for some of them :D

post all of your jokes here old ones, new ones lude and crude ones.you can make them as long as you like
ill shall start.

four nuns die an go to heaven
st peter asks have you had any contact with a penis
1st:i once touched one with my finger
peter says:dip it in holy water next nun says
ive fondled one so he says put your hand in the holy water sudenly theres a commotion,

a nun has pushed to the front of the queue
st peter asks whats up the nun says well if i gargle that holy water i want to do it before sister anne sticks her arse in it !!!

A joke thread is what I wanted !

This might have been a day in the life of Booth's dear ol' mom ... if he hadn't gone the army/sniper/FBI route!!!

Four Catholic ladies were having coffee one afternoon.

The first Catholic woman tells her friends, "My son is a priest. When he walks into a room, everyone calls him 'father'."

The second Catholic woman chirps, "My son is a bishop. Whenever he walks into a room, people call him 'your grace'."

The third Catholic lady says, "My son is a Cardinal. Whenever he walks into a room, he's called ‘Your Eminence'."

The fourth Catholic woman sips her coffee in silence, the first three women prod her with a subtle, '"Well??"

So she replies, "My son is 6'1. He has broad, square shoulders. Terribly handsome. Tight muscular body. Hard buns and a very nice bulge. He is also a male dancer at a female strip club and whenever he walks into a room … women gasp, 'OH MY LORD'!

DBCrazy wrote:A joke thread is what I wanted !

This might have been a day in the life of Booth's dear ol' mom ... if he hadn't gone the army/sniper/FBI route!!!

Four Catholic ladies were having coffee one afternoon.

The first Catholic woman tells her friends, "My son is a priest. When he walks into a room, everyone calls him 'father'."

The second Catholic woman chirps, "My son is a bishop. Whenever he walks into a room, people call him 'your grace'."

The third Catholic lady says, "My son is a Cardinal. Whenever he walks into a room, he's called ‘Your Eminence'."

The fourth Catholic woman sips her coffee in silence, the first three women prod her with a subtle, '"Well??"

So she replies, "My son is 6'1. He has broad, square shoulders. Terribly handsome. Tight muscular body. Hard buns and a very nice bulge. He is also a male dancer at a female strip club and whenever he walks into a room … women gasp, 'OH MY LORD'!

ha ha brillaint thanks for posting

LOL great jokes!

OH my Lord... hahaha

Dog Diary

8:00 am - Dog food! My favorite thing!
9:30 am - A car ride! My favorite thing!
9:40 am - A walk in the park! My favorite thing!
10:30 am - Got rubbed and petted! My favorite thing!
12:00 pm - Lunch! My favorite thing!
1:00 pm - Played in the yard! My favorite thing!
3:00 pm - Wagged my tail! My favorite thing!
5:00 pm - Milk bones! My favorite thing!
7:00 pm - Got to play ball! My favorite thing!
8:00 pm - Wow! Watched TV with the people! My favorite thing!
11:00 pm - Sleeping on the bed! My favorite thing!


Cat Diary

Day 983 of my captivity. My captors continue to taunt me with bizarre little dangling objects. They dine lavishly on fresh meat, while the other inmates and I are fed hash or some sort of dry nuggets. Although I make my contempt for the rations perfectly clear, I nevertheless must eat something in order to keep up my strength.

The only thing that keeps me going is my dream of escape. In an attempt to disgust them, I once again vomit on the carpet. Today I decapitated a mouse and dropped its headless body at their feet. I had hoped this would strike fear into their hearts, since it clearly demonstrates what I am capable of. However, they merely made condescending comments about what a 'good little hunter' I am. Bastards!

There was some sort of assembly of their accomplices tonight. I was placed in solitary confinement for the duration of the event. However, I could hear the noises and smell the food. I overheard that my confinement was due to the power of 'allergies.' I must learn what this means, and how to use it to my advantage.

Today, I was almost successful in an attempt to assassinate one of my tormentors by weaving around his feet as he was walking. I must try this again tomorrow--but at the top of the stairs.

I am convinced that the other prisoners here are flunkies and snitches. The dog receives special privileges. He is regularly released--and seems to be more than willing to return. He is obviously retarded.

***
A college professor was doing a study testing the senses of first graders, using a bowl of lifesavers.

He gave all the children the same kind of lifesavers, one at a time, and asked them to identify them by color and flavor.

The children began:

"Red............cherry,"

"Yellow........lemon,"

"Green..........lime,"

"Orange.......orange."

Finally the professor gave them all a HONEY-flavored lifesaver.
After eating them for a few moments none of the children could identify the taste."Well," he said "I'll give you all a clue. It's what your mother may sometimes call your father." One little girl looked up in horror, spit hers out and yelled, "Oh My God!!!! They're assholes!"

Now that Vancouver has won the chance to host the 2010 Winter Olympics, these are some questions people the world over are asking!!!! Believe it or not these questions about Canada were posted on an International Tourism Website.

Obviously the answers are a joke; but the questions were really asked!!

Q:I have never seen it warm on Canadian TV, so how do the plants grow? (England )
A. We import all plants fully grown and then just sit around and watch them die.

Q:Will I be able to see Polar Bears in the street? (USA )
A: Depends on how much you've been drinking.

Q:I want to walk from Vancouver to Toronto -can I follow the Railroad tracks? (Sweden )
A: Sure, it's only Four thousand miles, take lots of water.

Q:Is it safe to run around in the bushes in Canada ? (Sweden )
A: So it's true what they say about Swedes.

Q:It is imperative that I find the names and addresses of places to contact for a stuffed Beaver. (Italy )
A: Let's not touch this one.

Q: Are there any ATM's (cash machines) in Canada ? Can you send me a list of them in Toronto , Vancouver , Edmonton and Halifax ? (England )
A: What did your last slave die of?

Q:Can you give me some information about hippo racing in Canada ? (USA )
A: A-fri-ca is the big triangle shaped continent south of Europe . Ca-na-da is that big country to your North...oh forget it. Sure, the hippo racing is every Tuesday night in Calgary . Come naked.

Q: Which direction is North in Canada ? (USA )
A: Face south and then turn 180 degrees Contact us when you get here and we'll send the rest of the directions.

Q: Can I bring cutlery into Canada ? (England )
A: Why? Just use your fingers like we do.

Q: Can you send me the Vienna Boys' Choir schedule? (USA )
A: Aus-tri-a is that quaint little country bordering Ger-man-y, which is...oh forget it. Sure, the Vienna Boys Choir plays every Tuesday night in Vancouver and in Calgary , straight after the hippo races. Come naked.

Q: Do you have perfume in Canada ? (Germany )
A: No, WE don't stink.

Q: I have developed a new product that is the fountain of youth. Can you sell it in Canada ? (USA )
A: Anywhere significant numbers of Americans gather.

Q: Can you tell me the regions in British Columbia where the female population is smaller than the male population? (Italy )
A: Yes, gay nightclubs

Q: Do you celebrate Thanksgiving in Canada ? (USA )
A: Only at Thanksgiving.

Q: Are there supermarkets in Toronto and is milk available all year round? (Germany )
A: No, we are a peaceful civilization of Vegan hunter/gathers. Milk is illegal.

Q: I have a question about a famous animal in Canada , but I forget its name. It's a kind of big horse with horns. (USA )
A: It's called a Moose. They are tall and very violent. They roam the city streets eating the brains of anyone walking close to them. Spraying yourself with human urine before you go out walking will scare them off.

Q: Will I be able to speak English most places I go? (USA )
A: Yes, but you will have to learn it first.

The Men's Dictionary ...

* "I can't find it." - REALLY MEANS: "It didn't fall into my outstretched hands, so I'm completely clueless."
* "That's women's work." - REALLY MEANS: "It's dirty, difficult and thankless."
* "Will you marry me?" - REALLY MEANS: "Both my roommates have moved out, I can't find the washer, and there is no more peanut butter."
* "It's a guy thing." - REALLY MEANS: "There is no rational thought pattern connected with it, and you have no chance at all of making it logical."
* "Can I help with dinner?" - REALLY MEANS: "Why isn't it already on the table?"
* "It would take too long to explain." - REALLY MEANS: "I have no idea how it works."
* "I'm getting more exercise lately." - REALLY MEANS: "The batteries in the remote are dead."
* "We're going to be late." - REALLY MEANS: "Now I have a legitimate excuse to drive like a maniac."
* "Take a break, honey, you're working too hard." - REALLY MEANS: "I can't hear the game over the vacuum cleaner."
* "That's interesting, dear." - REALLY MEANS: "Are you still talking?"
* "Honey, we don't need material things to prove our love." - REALLY MEANS: "I forgot our anniversary again."
* "It's really a good movie." - REALLY MEANS: "It's got guns, knives, fast cars and naked women."
* "You know how bad my memory is." - REALLY MEANS: " I remember the words to the theme song of "F Troop", the address of the first girl I kissed, the VIN of every car I've ever owned, but I forgot your birthday."
* "I was just thinking about you, and got you these roses." - REALLY MEANS: "The girl selling them on the corner was a real babe, wearing a thong."
* "Oh, don't fuss. I just cut myself. It's no big deal." - REALLY MEANS: "I have actually severed a limb, but will bleed to death before I admit I'm hurt."
* "I do help around the house." - REALLY MEANS: "I once threw a dirty towel near the laundry basket."
* "Hey, I've got reasons for what I'm doing." - REALLY MEANS: "And I sure hope I think of some pretty soon."
* "What did I do this time?" - REALLY MEANS: "What did you catch me at?"
* "I heard you." - REALLY MEANS: "I haven't the foggiest clue what you just said, and am hoping desperately that I can fake it well enough so that you don't spend the next three days yelling at me."
* "You really look terrific in that outfit." - REALLY MEANS: "Please don't try on one more outfit. I'm starving."
* "I brought you a present." - REALLY MEANS: "It was free ice scraper night at the ball/hockey game."
* "I missed you." - REALLY MEANS: "I can't find my sock drawer, the kids are hungry and we are out of toilet paper."
* "I'm not lost. I know exactly where we are." - REALLY MEANS: "No one will ever see us alive again."
* "This relationship is getting too serious." - REALLY MEANS: "I like you as much as I like my truck."
* "I don't need to read the instructions." - REALLY MEANS: "I am perfectly capable of screwing it up without printed help.

Giving a cat a pill vs a dog....

How to give a cat a pill....

1. Pick up cat and cradle it in the crook of your left arm as if holding a baby. Position right forefinger and thumb on either side of cat's mouth and gently apply pressure to cheeks while holding pill in righthand. As cat opens mouth, pop pill into mouth. Allow cat to close mouth and swallow.

2. Retrieve pill from floor and cat from behind sofa. Cradle cat in left arm and repeat process.

3. Retrieve cat from bedroom, and throw soggy pill away.

4. Take new pill from foil wrap, cradle cat in left arm, holding rear paws tightly with left hand. Force jaws open and push pill to back of mouth with right forefinger. Hold mouth shut for a count of ten.

5. Retrieve pill from goldfish bowl and cat from top of wardrobe. Call spouse from garden.

6. Kneel on floor with cat wedged firmly between knees, hold front and rear paws. Ignore low growls emitted by cat. Get spouse to hold head firmly with one hand while forcing wooden ruler into mouth. Drop pill down ruler and rub cat's throat vigorously.

7. Retrieve cat from curtain rail, get another pill from foil wrap. Make note to buy new ruler and repair curtains.Carefully sweep shattered figurines and vases from hearth and set to one side for gluing later.

8. Wrap cat in large towel and get spouse to lie on cat with head just visible from below armpit. Put pill in end of drinking straw, force mouth open with pencil and blow down drinking straw.

9. Check label to make sure pill not harmful to humans, drink a beer to take taste away. Apply Band-Aid to spouse's forearm and remove blood from carpet with cold water and soap.

10. Retrieve cat from neighbor's shed. Get another pill. Open another beer! Place cat in cupboard, and close door on to neck, to leave head showing. Force mouth open with dessert spoon. Flick pill down throat with elastic band.

11. Fetch screwdriver from garage and put cupboard door back on hinges.Drink beer. Fetch bottle of scotch. Pour shot of scotch, drink. Apply cold compress to cheek and check records for date of last tetanus shot. Apply whiskey compress to cheek to disinfect. Tossback another shot. Throw Tee shirt away and fetch new one from bedroom.

12. Call fire department to retrieve the damn cat from across the road. Apologize to neighbor who crashed into fence while swerving to avoid cat. Take last pill from foil wrap.

13. Tie the little bastard's front paws to rear paws with garden twineand bind tightly to leg of dining table, find heavy-duty pruning gloves from shed. Push pill into mouth followed by large piece of filet steak. Be rough about it. Hold head vertically and pour 2 pints of water down throat to wash pill down.

14. Consume remainder of scotch. Get spouse to drive you to the emergency room, sit quietly while doctor stitches fingers and forearm and removes pill remnants from right eye. Call furniture shop on way home to order new table.

15. Arrange for SPCA to collect mutant cat from hell and call local pet shop to see if they have any hamsters.

How to Give A Dog A Pill:

1. Wrap it in bacon.
2. Toss it in the air.

How To Shower Like a Woman:

Take off clothing and place it in sectioned laundry hamper according
to lights and darks.

Walk to bathroom wearing long dressing gown. If you see husband along
the way, cover up any exposed areas.

Look at your womanly physique in the mirror - make mental note to do
more sit-ups/leg -lifts, etc.

Get in the shower. Use face cloth, arm cloth, leg cloth, long loofah,
wide loofah and pumice stone.

Wash your hair once with cucumber and sage shampoo with 43 added
vitamins.

Wash your hair again to make sure it's clean.

Condition your hair with grapefruit mint conditioner enhanced with
real passion fruit.

Wash your face with crushed apricot facial scrub for 10 minutes until
red.

Wash entire rest of body with ginger nut and jaffa cake body wash.

Rinse conditioner off hair.

Shave armpits and legs.

Turn off shower.

Squeegee off all wet surfaces in shower.

Spray mould spots with Tilex.

Get out of shower and stand on bath mat.

Dry with towel the size of a small country.

Wrap hair in super absorbent towel. Return to bedroom wearing long
dressing gown and towel on head.

If you see husband along the way, cover up any exposed areas.



How To Shower Like a Man:

Take off clothes while sitting on the edge of the bed and leave them
in a pile.

Walk naked to the bathroom.

If you see wife along the way, shake wiener at her making the woo-woo'
sound.

Look at your manly physique in the mirror.

Admire the size of your wiener and scratch your ass.

Get in the shower Wash your face. Wash your armpits.

Blow your nose in your hands and let the water rinse them off.

Fart and laugh at how loud it sounds in the shower.

Spend majority of time washing privates and surrounding area.

Wash your butt, leaving those coarse butt hairs stuck on the soap.

Wash your hair. Make a Shampoo Mohawk. Pee.

Rinse off and get out of shower. Avoid bath mat.

Dry off forearms and butt only.

Fail to notice water on floor because curtain was hanging out of tub
the whole time.

Admire wiener size in mirror again. Shake it to watch water fly off.

Leave shower curtain open, wet mat on floor, light and fan on.

Return to bedroom with towel around waist.

If you pass wife, pull off towel, shake wiener at her and make the
woo-woo' sound again.

Throw wet towel on bed.

If there is anyone among you who did not laugh at the truth behind
this, there is something so very wrong with you.

Have a great day! And, 'woo woo'!!

This is all what she said when Kellie Pickler was on 'Are You Smarter then a Fifth Grader'

Pickler was unsure whether or not a roadrunner was a bird, hoped that a foreign language might be English, stated she felt "really smart right now" after identifying that "watermelon" contains two E's, said that a piccolo was a percussion instrument, stated that she thought Europe was a country but France was not, and decided that Franklin Pierce was a US president because her ears were pierced. She ultimately walked away with $50,000 for charity.
Europe thing!
[Only admins are allowed to see this link]
Watermelon:
[Only admins are allowed to see this link]
Piccolo:
[Only admins are allowed to see this link]

LMAO to all of the above.

The Hormone Hostage

The Hormone Hostage knows that there are days in the month when all a man has to do is open his mouth and he takes his life in his own hands! This is a handy guide that should be as common as a driver's license in the wallet of every husband, boyfriend, co-worker or significant other!

DANGEROUS:
SAFER:
SAFEST:
ULTRA SAFE:

What's for dinner?
Can I help you with dinner?
Where would you like to go for dinner?
Here, have some wine.

Are you wearing that?
Wow, you sure look good in brown!
WOW! Look at you!
Here, have some wine

What are you so worked up about?
Could we be overreacting?
Here's my paycheck.
Here, have some wine.

Should you be eating that?
You know, there are a lot of apples left.
Can I get you a piece of chocolate with that?
Here, have some wine.

What did you DO all day?
I hope you didn't over-do it today.
I've always loved you in that robe!
Here, have some more wine.


13 Things PMS Stands For:

1 Pass My Shotgun

2 Psychotic Mood Shift

3 Perpetual Munching Spree

4 Puffy Mid-Section

5 People Make me Sick

6 Provide Me with Sweets

7 Pardon My Sobbing

8 Pimples May Surface

9 Pass My Sweat pants

10. Pissy Mood Syndrome

11. Plainly; Men Suck

12. Pack My Stuff

13. Potential Murder Suspect

these are all brillaint thanks guys for your posts

the position known as 69 is now known as 96 due to recession going up the increase on eating out has increased lol

courtesy of karlia (lil sis)

A husband and wife were sitting watching a TV program about psychology when he turned to his wife and said, Honey, I'll bet you twenty bucks that you can't tell me something that will make me happy and sad at the same time."

Without hesitation, she turned to him and replied,"You have the biggest penis of all your golfing buddies at the Country Club. Pay up!"

Things Got Ya Down? Well Then, Consider These.

In a hospital's Intensive Care Unit, patients always died in the same bed, on Sunday morning, at about 11:00 am , regardless of their medical condition. This puzzled the doctors and some even thought it had something to do with the supernatural. No one could solve the mystery as to why the deaths occurred around 11:00 am Sunday, so a worldwide team of experts was assembled to investigate the cause of the incidents. The next Sunday morning, a few minutes before 11:00 am all of the doctors and nurses nervously waited outside the ward to see for themselves what the terrible phenomenon was all about. Some were holding wooden crosses, prayer books, and other holy objects to ward off the evil spirits. Just when the clock struck 11:00 , Pookie Johnson, the part-time Sunday sweeper , entered the ward and unplugged the life support system so he could use the vacuum cleaner.

Still Having a Bad Day????

The average cost of rehabilitating a seal after the Exxon Valdez Oil spill in Alaska was $80,000.00. At a special ceremony, two of the most expensively saved animals were being released back into the wild amid cheers and applause from onlookers. A minute later, in full view, a killer whale ate them both.

Still think you are having a Bad Day????

A woman came home to find her husband in the kitchen shaking frantically, almost in a dancing frenzy, with some kind of wire running from his waist towards the electric kettle. Intending to jolt him away from the deadly current, she whacked him with a handy plank of wood, breaking his arm in two places. Up to that moment, he had been happily listening to his Walkman.

Are Ya OK Now? - No?

Two animal rights defenders were protesting the cruelty of sending pigs to a slaughterhouse in Bonn , Germany . Suddenly, all two thousand pigs broke loose and escaped through a broken fence, stampeding madly. The two helpless protesters were trampled to death.

What?!? STILL having a Bad Day????

Iraqi terrorist Khay Rahnajet didn't pay enough postage on a letter bomb.It came back with 'Return to Sender' stamped on it. Forgetting it was the bomb, he opened it and was blown to bits. God is Good!

There now, Feeling Better?

thanks for posting missi that was really funny

On L!w/R&K today David was talking about the birds & the bees conversation he had with Jaden. His story was touching, but I thought we might as well have a joke too ...


The Birds and The Bees
A father asks his 10-year-old son if he knows about the birds and the bees.

"I don't want to know!" the child says, bursting into tears. "Promise me you won't tell me!"

Confused, the father asks what's wrong.

"Oh, dad," the boy sobs. "When I was six, I got the 'There's no Santa speech'. At seven, I got the 'There's no Easter Bunny' speech. When I was eight, you hit me with the 'There's no tooth fairy' speech.

"If you're going to tell me that grown ups don't really get laid, I'll have nothing left to live for!"

---

DBCrazy wrote:On L!w/R&K today David was talking about the birds & the bees conversation he had with Jaden. His story was touching, but I thought we might as well have a joke too ...


The Birds and The Bees
A father asks his 10-year-old son if he knows about the birds and the bees.

"I don't want to know!" the child says, bursting into tears. "Promise me you won't tell me!"

Confused, the father asks what's wrong.

"Oh, dad," the boy sobs. "When I was six, I got the 'There's no Santa speech'. At seven, I got the 'There's no Easter Bunny' speech. When I was eight, you hit me with the 'There's no tooth fairy' speech.

"If you're going to tell me that grown ups don't really get laid, I'll have nothing left to live for!"

---

Hehe.

Proper Exercise while Pregnant
The room was full of pregnant women and their partners, and the Lamaze class was in full swing. The instructor was teaching the women how to breathe properly, along with informing the men how to give the necessary assurances at this stage of the plan.

The teacher then announced, "Ladies, exercise is good for you. Walking is especially beneficial. And, gentlemen, it wouldn't hurt you to take the time to go walking with your partner!"

The room really got quiet. Finally, a man in the middle of the group raised his hand.

"Yes?" replied the teacher.

"Is it alright if she carries a golf bag while we walk?"

----------------------------------------------------------------

David likes to play golf, right!!

Apple announced today that it has developed a breast implant that can storeand play music. The iTit will cost from $499 to $699, depending on cupandspeaker size. This is considered a major social breakthrough, because women are always complaining about men staring at their breasts and not listening to them.

missdebra87 wrote:Apple announced today that it has developed a breast implant that can storeand play music. The iTit will cost from $499 to $699, depending on cupandspeaker size. This is considered a major social breakthrough, because women are always complaining about men staring at their breasts and not listening to them.

LOL! That's a great one, Deb!

DBCrazy wrote:

missdebra87 wrote:Apple announced today that it has developed a breast implant that can storeand play music. The iTit will cost from $499 to $699, depending on cupandspeaker size. This is considered a major social breakthrough, because women are always complaining about men staring at their breasts and not listening to them.

LOL! That's a great one, Deb!

Thanks, I found it amusing...

Okay, so I'm sure most people have seen this but I still love it. A 17 year old sent this in

NAME: Greg Bulmash.
SEX: Not yet. Still waiting for the right person.
DESIRED POSITION: Company’s President or Vice President. But seriously, whatever’s available. If I was in a position to be picky, I wouldn’t be applying here in the first place.
DESIRED SALARY: $185,000 a year plus stock options and a Michael Ovitz style severance package. If that’s not possible, make an offer and we can haggle.
EDUCATION: Yes.
LAST POSITION HELD: Target for middle management hostility.
SALARY: Less than I’m worth.
MOST NOTABLE ACHIEVEMENT: My incredible collection of stolen pens and post-it notes.
REASON FOR LEAVING: It sucked.
HOURS AVAILABLE TO WORK: Any.
PREFERRED HOURS: 1:30-3:30 p.m., Monday, Tuesday, and Thursday.
DO YOU HAVE ANY SPECIAL SKILLS?: Yes, but they’re better suited to a more intimate environment.
MAY WE CONTACT YOUR CURRENT EMPLOYER?: If I had one, would I be here?
DO YOU HAVE ANY PHYSICAL CONDITIONS THAT WOULD PROHIBIT YOU FROM LIFTING UP TO 50 LBS?: Of what?
DO YOU HAVE A CAR?: I think the more appropriate question here would be “Do you have a car that runs?”
HAVE YOU RECEIVED ANY SPECIAL AWARDS OR RECOGNITION?: I may already be a winner of the Publishers Clearing house Sweepstakes.
DO YOU SMOKE?: On the job no, on my breaks yes.
WHAT WOULD YOU LIKE TO BE DOING IN FIVE YEARS?: Living in the Bahamas with a fabulously wealthy dumb sexy blonde super model who thinks I’m the greatest thing since sliced bread. Actually, I’d like to be doing that now.
DO YOU CERTIFY THAT THE ABOVE IS TRUE AND COMPLETE TO THE BEST OF YOUR KNOWLEDGE?: Yes. Absolutely.

Caution ... Political humor to follow ... Turn back now if you think you should!!!

---------------------------------------------------------------------

COMPANY MEMO

From the Boss

As the CEO of this organization, I have resigned myself to the fact that Barrack Obama is our President and that our taxes and government fees will increase in a BIG way.

To compensate for these increases, our prices would have to increase by about 10%. But since we cannot increase our prices right now due to the dismal state of the economy, we will have to lay off six of our employees instead. This has really been bothering me, since I believe we are family here and I didn't know how to choose who would have to go.

So, this is what I did. I walked through our parking lot and found six 'Obama' bumper stickers on our employees' cars and have decided these folks will be the ones to let go. I can't think of a more fair way to approach this problem. They voted for change; I gave it to them.

I will see the rest of you at the annual company picnic.