Archive #23

Evi wrote:Lol PIMP and Jonez...we're not to testing yet though we probably should be. My husband is going to be mortified!

I vamoosed for some fresh homemade icecream. Banana. YUMMINESS!!!!!!!

jonezn4Bones wrote:

himbeer29 wrote:lol jonez! that's really funny... I mean, I'm sure it was incredibly awkward. but it makes a good story now!

At 20 I had a major bout with kidney stones. The urologist wanted to make sure my entire system was working so he sent me to a women's clinic to give a sample. I walk int a room the looks like a homeless shelter and at the end is a small window. I told them what I was there for and walked for half an hour to the other end of the room to find a seat not occupied by the 100 plus women in the room. It was just like Pimp's ordeal. The window slid open and a loud voice yelled "You're here for the semen analysis? Right?!?!?!"

Now, I am an exhibitionist attention seeking sort of guy (perhaps that's news?) but not that much of one. So I follow the nurse down the hall to a little room. Now the prep for all of this was a warning from the doctor to have absolutely no "spills" for 5 days before the test. I'm TWENTY???!?!?!?! Nearly impossible - but, OK. If I had any loss of soldiers in my sleep or from any waking activities I was to call and reschedule for another 5 day wait. So, I was happy that the ordeal was almost over. But, the crotchety, 80 year old nurse with the shrivel factor personality was not helping. Go in here and when you're done, take it to the lab attendant down the hall . . .If you MISS, come tell me and we'll reschedule for another 5 days from now . . "

Miss? I thought. How can I miss? Then I saw the jar with an opening the diameter of a nickel!!!! This is NOT an operation where aim is the goal to achieving success?!?!

I immediately had a flashback to high school health when the discussion turned to sperm banks and surmising how one made a "deposit." The girl next to me passed me a cartoon she drew of a big boobed woman with the word "ASSISTANT" written across her chest.

Not at the clinic where I found myself. It was a sterile little room with a sink and when I set the jar down it slid out of arms reach - EVERY time I set the jar down . .

But I managed to get the job done and didn't even zip everything up just enough to get the jar into the hands of the guy at the lab. Imagine my surprise to be in the "afterglow" - almost unfastened - and hand a hot jar of my stuff to a gorgeous 19 year old blonde.

Turi ray of sunshine wrote:

Oh and before I forget it again. How did it go with the phone card creep? Did you get it all sorted out after?

I did Sany! I really couldn’t take one more time of being treated like that! so I went to the nice lady with the dollar store and she actually had the cards; so I’ve been getting them from her.
As I said I walk to the next bus stop right by that place; so the only thing that I am hoping is that he will learn to keep his distance.

Thanks for asking Sany!!!

Glad to hear it Turi. I know the guy was creeping you out big time.

jonezn4Bones wrote:I know so many men that can't even think about doing that. They tell me there's no way they could go through with it. I've seen guys smuggled in the little brown bag from home like they were on the run as a spy.

Turi ray of sunshine wrote:

Glad to hear it Turi. I know the guy was creeping you out big time.

Did I tell you that the last time I was there he asked if I wanted a ride home!?!? since he had seen me wating for my medium of transportation??
INCREDIBLE!!! and not in a good or pleasant way!!

Turi ray of sunshine wrote:

Glad to hear it Turi. I know the guy was creeping you out big time.

Did I tell you that the last time I was there he asked if I wanted a ride home!?!? since he had seen me wating for my medium of transportation??
INCREDIBLE!!! and not in a good or pleasant way!!

Turi ray of sunshine wrote:

Glad to hear it Turi. I know the guy was creeping you out big time.

Did I tell you that the last time I was there he asked if I wanted a ride home!?!? since he had seen me wating for my medium of transportation??
INCREDIBLE!!! and not in a good or pleasant way!!

Evi wrote:

jonezn4Bones wrote:I know so many men that can't even think about doing that. They tell me there's no way they could go through with it. I've seen guys smuggled in the little brown bag from home like they were on the run as a spy.

We know a couple where she has very similar medical issues as I and they went through years of fertility treatments. My husband laughed and laughed as the man was telling the story of their treatments and all he said in reply was the simple but telling "It's all fine until you have to fill the cup."

Turi ray of sunshine wrote:I am glad you find it creepy Jonez, I told one of the guys that I work with and he told me “oh that will keep happening” let me tell ya that was no consolation whatsoever!!!!.
I was rather alarmed!!!

Turi ray of sunshine wrote:I am glad you find it creepy Jonez, I told one of the guys that I work with and he told me “oh that will keep happening” let me tell ya that was no consolation whatsoever!!!!.
I was rather alarmed!!!

Evi wrote:Alright I'm going to disappear again, with warning this time. I need to work on my script. My friendly competitor is getting a bit ahead of me

PIMP wrote:the woman can usually make it a pleasant experience at home - but no contaminants from her fluids - just lend a helping hand to collect it where it's supposed to end up.

Good luck with that!! lol

himbeer29 wrote:

Turi ray of sunshine wrote:I am glad you find it creepy Jonez, I told one of the guys that I work with and he told me “oh that will keep happening” let me tell ya that was no consolation whatsoever!!!!.
I was rather alarmed!!!

ah! that guy's a jerk! what a thing to say...

jonezn4Bones wrote:

PIMP wrote:the woman can usually make it a pleasant experience at home - but no contaminants from her fluids - just lend a helping hand to collect it where it's supposed to end up.

Good luck with that!! lol

I know. Never happened for me, either. Got some derogatory comment about "You've had plenty of practice."

Sany wrote:

himbeer29 wrote:

Turi ray of sunshine wrote:I am glad you find it creepy Jonez, I told one of the guys that I work with and he told me “oh that will keep happening” let me tell ya that was no consolation whatsoever!!!!.
I was rather alarmed!!!

ah! that guy's a jerk! what a thing to say...

Definitely got ot agree with Razz on this one. The guy is an ass.